A Cat's Diary

Day 751: My captors continue to torment me with bizarre dangling objects. They eat lavish meals in my presence while I am forced to subsist on dry cereal. The only thing that keeps me going is the hope of eventual escape -- that, and the satisfaction I get from occasionally ruining some piece of their furniture.
What do they think they are feeding me?Milk and fish bones day in and day out,let them have a taste of this meal for once,silly blokes.
That girl in the house-what does she think me?A cushion or an inanimate soft toy.Next time if she does that silly molly-codling exercise of hers on my petite frame m going to dig my teeth into her manicured hands.Silly girl,thinks she can copy my walk with that jumbo waist of hers.Simply intolerable when I have to bear the sight of her walking like that.
I simply go beserk when that old lady drenches me.I fear I may be going insane. Yesterday, I ate a houseplant. Tomorrow I may eat another.